Plan B - Part Two

"So what do you do with a shattered dream? What do you do with an unmet expectation? What do you do when your life isn't turning out the way you thought life was going to turn out? What do you do when you have to turn to plan B?"

I'll tell you what I have been doing.....

As a young and hopefully hip 31 1/2 year old my life isn't what I thought it would be. I never dreamed that I would still be single. In my mind by my mid twenties I was part of the statistics. the husband. the 2.5 kids. the minivan. the white picket fence. white shudders on 2 story home. i was living life with the man the Lord had created just for me. i even had numerous people in my life say it is just a matter of time...my prince is coming...you can believe the Lord for all those things...keep praying...be patient...put yourself out there...don't settle for something less than God's best for you.

So yeah...turns out I am a statistic all right. just so happens it's in the wrong category.

didn't. see. THAT. coming.

for all of you still wondering what I have chosen to do, well the wondering can stop. i have stewed in my anger, frustration, disappointment, resentment, bitterness, helplessness, and haven't been able to stop thinking about why me Lord, why me? I gave up. I quit fighting the good fight. Now don't get me wrong....there have been highs and lows along the way, but i definitely wouldn't get a medal or ribbon for my response to living Plan B. I have seen pockets of insight, hope, joy, and patience but overall my response has been less than pleasing to the Lord.

You know what I am coming to realize:

*all those positive things people kept telling me - yeah, so i'm not quite sure that they should have said all those things. they know the Lord's plan just as much as I do and basically that means they know nothing. Telling me to keep hoping I don't think is the right thing to say...dare I say I don't think it's the biblical thing to say. My hope...my trust...my faith needs to be in Him not in the chance of my circumstances changing. Those things, granted are nice and encouraging to hear, are not necessarily an accurate picture of what God's desire is for me. What if my prince doesn't ever come? What if he isn't just around the corner? Be patient for something that He may never choose to bless me with? BUT instead, hold fast onto Him...the author and perfector of our faith...the One who has all of my days ordained....the One who knit me together in my mothers womb...the One who says that I fearfully and wonderfully made...yes, those things I need to hold onto with everything that is in me.

Please don't hear me say that I am Debbie Downer....whawhawhawha....I am just thinking that we don't know what the Lord has for any of us and we shouldn't be in the business of making promises to people that may never get fulfilled. We shouldn't pretend to know what His plans are. And TRUST ME when I say that I have said all of those things to other gals. Plenty o' times. because in my heart of hearts I want those things for them. I want them to have their desires met in the way they want them because I want to be joyful alongside them. What I think we all fail to realize is that His best is what will give us Ultimate Joy and that we should spur each other on to know Him, to love Him, to abide in Him, not to hope for things He can give us. (Preaching to myself as I stand on this soapbox!!!!!)

whew....Part 2 has been a lil intense...

i'm tired.

i'll leave you with this: "constant contact with the Creator is essential for transformation living. If you want faith enough to live the life God's called you to live, time with God is simply a must. And that applies double when you're facing a Plan B situation." Thanks Pete Wilson for spelling out such simple truth in a very practial, matter-of-fact way.

More to come...Part 3 is on the horizon. (by the way, i have NO IDEA how many parts there are. ha!)